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Changing It Up

Updated: Aug 12, 2022


So, Brene Brown says that clear is kind.

I love that because I value clear communication.


I'm taking a risk and changing things up.


I've been having a hard time recently making myself do anything.


I also have lived a life where I pushed myself to do what I think I'm supposed to do without caring what the impact on me is.


So, I'm stuck in a place of wanting to be a person of integrity and a person who shows up by posting a blog post every week and trying to find the balance and taking care of myself and allowing myself rest.


I have tons of thoughts and feelings that are swirling around inside of me.


I feel like creative juices are flowing like crazy.


And, I feel like having a specific outcome in mind is actually getting in my way.


I trust that stepping out into this ….


This feels extremely risky and a little bit like cheating.


If I'm completely honest, I feel like I'm coming up with an excuse to not have to show up and do the work.


But, at the same time, I have a deep sense that making this change and allowing this freedom is going to open up creativity inside me that I have no idea what it will look like, and that I've never experienced before.


I believe that if I want to inspire other people to take risks, then I have to take risks.


And, that's risky.


So, here's what I wrote as a note to me, for what I'm doing.


Clear is kind

So is rest

Showing up matters


(Those can feel in conflict for me.)


I want to show up for myself by writing and posting a weekly blog post. I want to give myself space to sit with all the thoughts and feelings swirling inside me.


I want time to rest.


So, I am going to spend some time slowing down.


I will hold my integrity by posting weekly.


I will not force myself to create something specific.


It may be a random thought I'm chewing on. A note to self that I may need to hear.

I'm opening space for something new.


Or, not.


I don't know what the season will bring. But, it feels important to honor it and step into it and risk.


I have such deep gratitude for the people who have been following this journey. I want to show up for you, too.

But, I realized, I don't even know what that means.


So, all I can do is keep showing up as myself and trust and hope that me being a human being will give you permission to be one, too.

Whatever that means.


So, I'm changing things up.


And, I don't know what that's gonna look like.

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4 Comments


Love this Jill!! "Leap and the net will appear." Proud of you!

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Jill Anthony
Jill Anthony
Aug 02, 2022
Replying to

Thank you! Since deciding this, I've experienced everything from "the sky's the limit" to "what is even going to be different". So. Many. Feelings. Always happens when I step into the unknown.

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Judah Anthony
Judah Anthony
Aug 02, 2022

Love it!

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a2sgrandma
a2sgrandma
Aug 02, 2022
Replying to

Me too! 😊❤️

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